Sunday, January 28, 2007

The Evolution of LUV

Ahhh, to GET IT is a divinely magnificent feeling! To actually see it, touch it and to feel it is breathtaking. When situations occur we always ask why. Sometimes we want to know the answer, others...well, I'm sure you have felt the same as I, so you know what I mean.

Last year I posted my feelings with a blog titled Return To Sender. I was a bit more than aggravated that I wasn't chosen for a position with the Post Office. My aggravation came from the fact that, and this is only MY belief, I wasn't chosen because of a previous termination from a job over a bookmark, not soley on my job qualifications or experience.

If I had gotten the JOB a part of my writing CAREER would be over. Ocassionally, I write short stories of the erotic (can I type that here? HAIL yeah, this is Wanda's Way!) erotic genere. The advertising of these stories on a bookmark is what got me booted in the first place. Well, if I had gotten the JOB there would be no more stories in this genre again. No more submissions to see if I had what it took to run with the dogs that bark deep. (actually, I think all writers have bass, but that is another post coming soon to a blog near you)

I'm sure I've said this is in a previous post, but I have heard that being told no isn't always a bad thing. Of course we all hate rejection, and hate to hear another door will open and the rest of the perfect clique'. Listening without responding can be bright gold - or is the in thing platinum? Whichever it is, it can work.

I recently submitted some short stories for inclusion in upcoming anthologies. I can bark deep now. My stories were accepted. Do you see what I see? If I was an employee of a certain agency I never would have taken a chance on this wonderful opportunity. Sheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeiiiit! Tell me no again!

One anthology is Zane's Chocolate Flava 2, tenatively scheduled for release in August of 2007. The other is Ms. Kisha Green's The Sugar Wall Chronicles, scheduled for release in May of 2007. Now, when I began my blog I started it because I was upset of the impending loss of my job due to an erotic bookmark. No naked people on it, just words that made you want more. No one wanted more of those words then. Wrong submission. Can you imagine how I feel now? Using some of those words has given me the opportunity to smell my career - to chew it and swallow it - to gain weight from it that doesn't land on my thighs! This feels like validation, and that's all we ever want. Somebody to say we matter. Somebody to say I love you. Somebody to always care.

Am I monetarily rich now? Nope. Can I quit my job and live comfortably? Nope. I can take less stress filled breaths. That's what I've been striving for. That's what I can taste. That's what I get. It is my IT. I haven't stopped turning or progressing. You know ya gotta keep on pushin'. Ahhhh, The Evolution of LUV is a beautiful thing.

Saturday, January 13, 2007

Missing You - And You - And You - And You...

Yesterday morning I heard the new Gerald Levert song. The Steve Harvey Morning Show played it as the last song on his show. The intro was Eddie Levert speaking about his son and then Gerald began singing. I honestly can't tell you the name. I think it's called My Songs. He's singing about how he wants to make love/fall in love, get married and do all of these wonderful things while he's listening to his songs.

I was at work when I heard it. I stood up for the entire song - like I was pledging allegience - and damn near cried as the song played. It is a Gerald Levert song, which means it is good.

I am looking forward to his CD. It's weird, but I never bought the Luther Vandross CD because I didn't want to buy the "last" CD Luther ever made. I wanted to always think I could purchase Luther's latest CD. WEIRD. I will buy The CD by Gerald Levert, though. I am 40 years old. Gerald Levert died at the age of 40. I guess I feel like I grew up with him - I owe him.

Death makes you grow up. Lord I can't stand it. I can't tell you how many times I have stared at the picture of James Brown lying in his coffin. Is it really him? I watched a few old film clips of him. Boy could that man MOVE. I watched the services of Gerald and Luther. Did they really happen?

I'm speaking about celebrities - people that lived their lives to entertain. I know death happens everyday to ordinary people like me. I always try to figure out what are the reasons for my posts. Well, yesterday, after a LONG day I was driving home FAST to pick up my Poopah from the childcare center. I cursed because the traffic became heavy and I had to slow down. I was angry about the traffic and cursed because I just wanted to go. My heart hurt when I saw the reason for the slow down. A man lay dead in the middle of the Grand Central Parkway. I saw this. I rode past him. I couldn't believe I saw a dead man lying in the middle of the street. It was dark. The 11 o'clock news would have to verifiy this for me.

The story wasn't on the 11o'clock news, but instead on the morning news. A man had been wandering and was hit by two cars. I did see a dead man lying in the street. I saw that man all day long today. I had to ride by the same spot this evening. I saw him again. I also heard Gerald Levert's song again. Death was just talking to me...telling me it's real.

This post is about spoken love, showing love, feeling love. When you die who do you know will love you? If you weren't married to your husband or wife, or if your children weren't yours would you like them? Do you love them? Lord, confusion surrounds me right now. Young death - old death - unecessary death - or at least that's what we say. Death is a part of the living process.

I'm think I'm rambling, but my heart is heavy right now for those that are gone and for those that are still here. For those that are missing you - and you - and you...I love you. And there is nothing more for me to say.

Monday, January 01, 2007

Happy New Year!

May we all have an abundance of blessings in 2007. I really don't have resoulutions, well, not anything that is so different than what I wanted for myself in 2006. I pray that I can keep my daughters safe and always provide for them. I pray that every negative situation in my life turns to positive, and that patience and appreciation travel with me always.

Wait for Love: A Black Girl's Story? Oh, of course I'll talk about that. hehehe. Please visit my webpage - to read the reviews and excerpts. This is a self published novel that is holding her own. Just purchase your autographed copy - you'll see. :-)

Let us remember why we're here and if you don't know, use this fresh new year to figure out why, and then put that knowledge to excellent use.

I love you!

Wanda D. Hudson
Wait for Love: A Black Girl's Story