Saturday, September 23, 2006

Return To Sender

Hmmm...This post is troubling to me. It's freeing, also. That's the troubling aspect of it. I guess I should just type and see what concoction my mixed emotions will present.

Recently I interviewed for a job with the Post Office. The entire process consisted of taking the postal exam last year, passing it, and then having your name placed on a list to be called when positions became open. I received a notice on August 12th informing me that my name had been reached and that I was to have an interview August 16th.

Actually, I had forgotten about the Post Office...I mean, nobody ever retires from there until they have to. Good money, excellent benefits, and a pension plan. WOOHOO! This is a job that I just had to have.

The Application - Twice on the application it asked if you have ever been terminated from a job. If you have followed my blog, you may recall that I was fired from a job in April of 2005 for passing out a bookmark for my ebook. I no longer have the ebook, and am not affiliated with the site. Well, I couldn't lie - it's the government. If Watergate unfolded, what exactly would make me think my past trangression would remain hidden?

I told the truth, the entire truth, and then told some more. Everything else about my application was fine. My personality, my work ethics, my past work experience and my eagerness was beyond the call of duty. A duty that had something to do with opening up storage bins and taking mail out. Nothing spectacular, but something that would keep the US Postal Service moving flawlessly.

I found out yesterday that I wasn't the best candidate for the job. Hmmm...I guess I have to believe that. I mean, they don't know who I really am - or do they? I truly believe that me being me, my following my dream - my passion, is why I didn't get the job.

So many questions were asked about the infamous bookmark. What did it say? Your former boss wrote on his report that it said something. Write an essay stating what it said and what exactly happened. I did that twice. I explained it three times - to the same person. I told that I had my baby, Wait for Love: A Black Girl's Story in circulation, too. I received an excellent recommendation from my former surpervisor, you know, the one I worked under when I was fired. He wasn't the one who fired me, he actually requested that I be written up, and given another chance. We actually conferred about what I said and what he would say, so we would be on the same page, and hopefully I would be hired.

Not qualified? Or too qualified to cause "problems"? Hmmm...once again I have to say my bookmark cost me a job. At least that's what I believe.

I'm sure there are many people out there who can do many things better than I. They have paper that says so. That I don't doubt. But in this case, hmmm...doubt is all I have.

I'm not going to list the conversations that took place during this process, but they are guiding me to feel that it came down to my previous shortcoming. So many questions about a bookmark. No questions about my present job, my supervisors, my military questions that would help me get an -in-it-for-the-long-haul-retirement-job.

If you do a search of Wanda D. Hudson, you'll come up with a few listings. I believe a search escorted me out of a position. Am I upset? Hmmm... HELL YEAH! Not because I didn't get the job. I'm upset because of the reason I believe I didn't get the job. Will I ever know the "real" reason? HELL NAW!

Once again, life goes on. In my heart I know I'm talented. I'm the fabulous comedian Miss WandaLuv. I'm sexy - kinda chunky - not that FAT Chance chunk. :-)

The Post Office stamped me with a rubber marker that says Return To Sender. The one thing they surely failed to realize is this - The sender welcomed me back with open arms. When He sends me out again, get ready for Wanda D. Hudson, because there will be no limit for what my passion will allow me to do.

Monday, September 11, 2006

Wait for Love: A Black Girl's Story Reader Review

I have received many positive reviews for my novel, Wait for Love: A Black Girl's Story. This is one from a reader that I just had to share. It is posted on her blog and I asked her if I could post it here. This review made me feel more special than I already am...let me go kiss myself.

Entry for July 14, 2006 **REQUIRED READING!!** -Yahoo! 360 A BookWorms Blog

I am not even gonna lie or sugar coat anything when I tell you I was not liking this book when I first started reading it! I had no expectations and didn't build it to be anything worth talking about it. When people asked what it was about I replied by saying I'm reading trying to figure that out.
Just about 20 min ago I closed the book on Lynnette Donna Lee's life story. I know now that this book was meant to be read and it needs to become REQUIRED reading for all young girls. I'll even go as far as to say young boys only for the added value of life lessons that we learned from Lynnde.
Let me just give this quick recap of the book :
This was the most emotion filled rollercoaster ride that I have taken since reading A Woman's Worth! I literally twisted my face, got angry and cursed, wanted to put the book throw it, call somebody and slap them, run and talk to my mama, cried til my nose hurt, call up my BFF from HS, and then follow up with a song and dance to Happy Days are here!
That is just a summation of how I felt while reading this book. After first it was weird having the character of Lynnde talking to me. Yes, I did say talking to me. Most books you can become the character thru their thoughts and questions, but Wanda put a different spin on that. She actually had Lynnde talk to you and direct her every thought to you up front. At times I felt like I was intruding by reading someones diary entry because it was that vivid. Some things I read I was like did she have to take it there? Wanda has a talent in making the most visual of things so life like I swear I was right there and then when the illest of ill acts were happening to Lynnde.
Let me see I don't know where to start
I usually give blow by blow details but I tell you this is one book that is sooooo worth the read I don't want to ruin it by giving any spoilers!!When we meet Lynnde she is a very young naive teenager at the age of 18. We journey with her on this merry go round she calls life. At times it spirals out of control it takes flight and turns into a spinning top! The choices she makes are not wise ones and not only does Lynnde suffer emotionally, but her choices affect her body through poor eating habits which leads to a poor self image and lack of self worth. I won't paint the picture that she is all alone. She has a mother and a father no siblings but an awesome Best Friend by the name of Esta. Esta is like the jiminy cricket to our Lynnde. When Lynnde couldn't see the beauty or strength she possessed Esta saw it. Through all the mishaps Esta was right there telling her it's alright you just made a bad choice. Once you slow down and Wait! All things will be clear for you to see. So true and once Lynnde finally took the time to listen it really was all good in the end.
As I read this book I couldn't believe that she was so misinformed! She knew nothing and I had a hard time not calling her dumb. I don't like to use those words stupid, dumb, and clueless. But that's just what she was. I found myself getting angry at her mom wondering why if she loved her so much wouldn't she fill her in to the games of life? You have to be more prepared than Lynnde was. Not all fault and blame should go to her know the dad has a part also. She spent soooo much of her life being angry with him for past feelings never explained to her that I feel it's the main reason she made poor decisions when it came to men.
If I take anything away with me from this it is!
As a mother to three girls I want to be that mother that Lynnde needed. A loving, caring, mom that they can talk to. True Lynnde's mom did offer that after every failed attempt at love. I want my girls to come to me before! Come to me when they first experience that bark of puppy love. I want to prepare them the best I can. Let them know that it's not all Cinderalla, Sleeping Beauty and Shrek romance. There's way more to it than that. Since I do have my hunny Derek in my life I plan to tell them "our story" now with that I probably could write my own book, But hopefully through me and my past they can see their own future and know what to expect. This book has truly left a lasting impression on me and the story of Lynnde will stay with me. If you know of any young girl, woman, or anyone in a "hurry" to find love or at least their version of love..............HAND THEM THIS BOOK!!!
Wanda you did an excellent job! What a wonderful debut into the literary world! I look forward to reading many more of your novels. You truly have a way with insightful and descriptive. You've made me a fan
Bookworm Rating : 5 bookworms: What a wonderfully delicious treat!
Yummy to the very core

Friday, September 08, 2006

The Single Parent Trap

If it takes a village to raise a child, where does the village go when you need child care? The child care isn't for me to go out and hang in a nightclub, although my desire to perform stand up comedy requires that I am in this enviroment. My need for care comes from my being gainfully employed.

For the last few months my child care situation has been stressful to say the least. Child care providers deserve to get paid. They need to make a living. Just like its my job to perform a duty and get paid a decent wage, so do they. My dilema is this: If that "decent" wage isn't enough to cover your health insurance, utilites, travel expenses, family needs, and child care, what in the world are you working for?

It seems that lately I was working to pay my child care provider. If I worked overtime, I paid her overtime. She had my check spent before I did. Having other peoples hands in your pocket will keep you broke. Other people calculating how much you make and how come you don't have any money at times brings an anger that I simply cannot describe.

I am a parent that lives in the city that never sleeps, but I have no blood relatives near me. I moved from Upstate New York to live the American Dream of getting married and having a flourishing career. Once I woke up I was still single, but had a beautiful babygirl that I love.

Blended families - mommy lives here - daddy lives there - mommy married so and so's daddy - daddy is dating so and so's mommy...too much laying up to even begin to find a reason for. Send the child here, take the child there...frequent flier miles that get you nowhere.

Can a single parent work with the other parent in harmony? I can't answer that. Well then again, if you only take the child to the absent parent when it is convient for them I guess so. If I'm going to work, sure. Anything else, haha-hehe-hell-no!

It takes a village to raise a child. What if you live in a village where nobody knows your name, and nobody speaks your language? Where in the world do you live you ask? Trust me, I ask myself the same question. Is this America or...I don't want to sound racist so I won't elaborate. We're all God's children right? Well then why do you live there? I did mention something about a "decent" wage didn't I?

For me the only thing to do is keep on pushing, keep on trying to work it out. I don't believe you should stay with someone for the sake of the children. Hell, if you didn't like them before the child was born, arguing over who is going to do what isn't going to make a difference. So why in the world did you have a child with that person in the first place? I know you don't really think I'm going to answer that with anything that makes sense?

What doesn't kill you makes you stronger. True. But it sure does make you gasp for air a few times. I love my daughters. I didn't know I would be a single parent. I was raised with both of my parents in the home, but it seems like no sooner than my brother and I left they got divorced. You can be married and still be a single parent. Some say as long as they eat dinner together everynight it's okay. If you're chewing and looking at the back of the newspaper thats covering your husband's or wife's face, you're not eating together - you're eating at the same time.

I just let out a long sigh. I'm living what is in store for me. I'm loving what I'm living. The Single Parent Trap isn't one that can hurt you, but it will definitely keep you hustiling until you get it right.